Every once in a while, life needs re-evaluation. Things change, situations arise, and life surprises you. What worked before doesn’t work anymore. Right now, it feels like that’s occurring every week. And at the same time I’m stuck in a kind of stasis of change so that everything feels the same. I do one thing for a week, and the next week it’s different. There’s no advancement, just spinning idly in place. I’m not entirely sure how to solve this. And perhaps this is just another attempt to assign order to my chaotic stasis. I suppose only time will tell.
Today I attended the first of AKiss4Luck’s writing group, which she’s doing as a way to get feedback on her first draft. It’s not the first writing group I’ve ever attended. In fact after the last one I said “Enough.” I know exactly what I need to do to improve my writing. I need to write. Make the time and do it. But I don’t. At least, not for long and not for long enough to matter. Same with various blogs. I do them for a day or a week, and then…not at all. I like the idea of this blog. It has purpose. It gives meaning to my gaming.
But I’m struggling to make habits, the only habit that appears to be working is that of ever-changing games and ever-changing events. I know what needs to be done, but don’t do it. I’m not sure if I need to make a public promise to be accountable, or if I’ll just ignore that again. But I’m starting to get tired of not doing anything. Perhaps that’s the impetus I need to start.